Top 100 Christmas Songs
...and counting
- Christmastime Here (Could Never Be Like That), Wednesday Week (Midnight, 1984)
Wednesday Week consisted of the comely Callan sisters, Kristi and Kelly, plus an ever-evolving supporting crew. These days, they've largely been lost to the ages, but the band orbited around the L.A. indie rock scene for 30 years, recording a few EP's and a couple of LP's, most notably What We Had for Enigma in 1987. A pithy admixture of REM-derived jangle, girl group-inspired sass, and noisy, new wave urgency made "Christmastime Here" just about the best thing Wednesday Week ever did, and it is arguably the best song on the Midnight Christmas Mess series released by New York indie label-cum-record store Midnight Records. A poignant West Coast ode to holidays in the Big Apple, "Christmastime Here" repeats a theme heard in songs stretching back at least as far as "White Christmas" - this time with a post-modern twist. Turns out, bums warming themselves around trash barrel fires can be as evocative of the Christmas spirit as snowfall in Central Park or ice skating in Rockefeller Center. "Christmastime Here" has shown up on two CD compilations, Santa's Got A GTO and Ho Ho Ho Spice, and it was included on the near-definitive 2007 CD reissue of What We Had.
Pointless footnote: In the mid-90's, the Callan sisters - in the guise of Lucky - made an appearance at my old Austin, Texas, record store, ABCD's. Later, former Wednesday Week bass player Dave Provost briefly worked at the shop. [back to list] [learn more]
- Holiday Spirit,
The dB's (East Side Digital, 1993)
When Chris Stamey's 1985 Coyote EP, Christmas Time, was fleshed out in 1993 to a full-length East Side Digital album, one of the new songs was the dB's "Holiday Spirit." Stamey was a member of the dB's - and arguably the foundation of their high-concept power pop. But, the "Holiday Spirit" was written and sung by Peter Holsapple, the pop-savvy counterweight to Stamey's artsy eccentricity. In his hands, "Holiday Spirit" became an immediate Generation X yuletide anthem: ironic, irreverent, self-obsessed. "I've got that holiday spirit - Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! Gimme!" Holsapple screams over jangling guitars and a maniacal, pounding beat. In just one minute and twenty-six seconds, the band crams in three verses and three choruses of unrelenting sarcasm and sexual innuendo. Then, suddenly, it's over - efficient and brilliant, like Santa Claus himself. Christmas Time would be revised twice again, first by Collector's Choice in 2006 and then by Omnivore in 2015, but "Holiday Spirit" was wisely retained both times. [back to list] [learn more] - All I Want
For Christmas, Huey "Piano" Smith &
Clowns (Ace, 1962)
Huey "Piano" Smith & The Clowns were among the elite New Orleans groups, known for hits like "Rockin' Pneumonia And The Boogie Woogie Flu" and "Don't You Just Know It" that were instrumental in the development of the city's rollicking rhythm 'n' blues sound. That said, "All I Want For Christmas (Is A Little Bit Of Music)" is one song that needs no critical analysis. The Clowns sound like they're having a good time - a very good time - and all they want for Christmas, it turns out, is a little bit of music. Simple! Each nearly interchangeable song on their 1962 Ace album, 'Twas The Night Before Christmas, has the same infectious vibe, wherein Christmas is just another excuse for throwing a party. After its release, the album quickly disappeared from record store shelves, fueling persistent rumors that the record was banned due to the blasphemously raucous way the Clowns approached the holy season. Not so - it was a bad distribution deal - but it's easy to see how the rumors got started.
Happily, the album reemerged in the digital age, first on compact disc and later for download and streaming. It also showed up on a reissue of the Clowns' 1960 album Having A Good Time, and nearly the whole album is included on Ace's Rock And Roll Christmas, a poorly annotated compilation of the label's fine holiday offerings. [back to list] [learn more]
- Christmas
Is My Time Of Year, The Christmas Spirit (White Whale,
1968)
A true oddity in the annals of Christmas rock, "Christmas Is My Time Of Year" was recorded by the Christmas Spirit, a one-off collaboration by an oddball assortment of California rockers, some already famous, others soon to be. Written by Turtles singer Howard Kaylan and producer Chip Douglas (Monkees, Lovin' Spoonful, Turtles), it's a sterling (if eccentric) example of folk rock, and it brims with the festive spirit of the holidays. Lending a hand were Turtle Mark Volman (who, with Kaylan, later performed with Frank Zappa as Flo & Eddie); Gram and Gene Parsons (both of whom were members of the Byrds and the Flying Burrito Brothers, but were not related); Linda Ronstadt (who'd just left the Stone Poneys but would eventually become a country rock icon); Henry Diltz and Cyrus Faryar (who, with Douglas, had been members of the Modern Folk Quartet); and the Bessie Griffin and the Gospel Pearls, whose cacophonous caroling very nearly overwhelm the proceedings.
"Christmas Is My Time Of Year" was originally released as a single by tiny White Whale Records (known mainly for the Turtles) backed with "Will You Still Believe In Me," a lovely Christmas song written by Ronstadt's bandmate in the Stone Poneys, Robert Kimmell, and sung by Chip Douglas and Linda Ronstadt. The record flopped miserably, though the a-side was preserved for posterity on Rhino's long out-of-print 1984 LP, Rockin' Christmas: The 60's. It wouldn't be released in the digital age till 2004 when both sides appeared on the compact disc Out Of Nowhere: The White Whale Story Vol. 2, which was later reissued for download and streaming. "Christmas Is My Time Of Year" was also included on the Turtles' collection All The Singles (2016). [back to list]
- Merry Christmas (I Don't Want To Fight Tonight), Ramones (Beggars Banquet, 1987)
No punk rock act is bigger than New York's iconic Ramones, a band that could make a valid claim to having invented the stuff. They took the post-modern ennui of the Velvet Underground, the primitive fundamentalism of the Stooges, and the raw, streetwise energy of their peers the Heartbreakers and the Dictators, and distilled it to its essence. Their one-and-only holiday song, "Merry Christmas (I Don't Want To Fight Tonight)," is the perfect marriage of Johnny Ramone's chainsaw guitar, Joey Ramone's disarmingly sweet vocals, and the indomitable holiday spirit. "Christmas ain't the time for breaking each other's hearts," pleads Joey, and truer words have never been spoken.
Recorded more than a decade after their groundbreaking 1976 debut, "Merry Christmas" reflects the huge growth in the Ramones' songwriting chops, and it incorporates their well-documented love of Phil Spector and classic Tin Pan Alley pop. The band first released "Merry Christmas" in 1987 as the b-side of their Beggars Banquet UK single "I Wanna Live," and they later included it on their 1989 album Brain Drain - though in a new, more polished version. Both versions, however, were produced by Jean Beauvoir (Plasmatics) and Daniel Rey, so it's possible that they are built on the same basic track. Either way, Rhino's Punk Rock Xmas includes the hard-to-find single version with all its rough edges intact. The album version is much more common, appearing on Oglio's The Edge Of Christmas (1995), Rhino's VH1: The Big 80's Christmas (2001), Blackheart's Christmas A Go-Go (2008), and many others. [back to list]
- Sleigh Bell
Rock, Three Aces & A Joker (GRC, 1960)
In my relatively vast collection, I can think of very few Christmas records that qualify as honest-to-God, dyed-in-the-wool rockabilly. Some of the biggest Christmas hits (including "Jingle Bell Rock" and "Rockin' Around The Christmas Tree") bear a strong influence of the frenetic, hiccupping country/rock hybrid, but they're just not the real thing - think early Elvis, Carl Perkins, Johnny Burnette, et al.
Three Aces And A Joker, on the other hand, hit the rockabilly nail on the head with this primeval masterpiece, recorded in 1959 and released the following year. The Aces were an obscure trio from Salt Lake City whose best-known song, "Booze Party," must have made them pariahs in their teetotalling, Mormon-dominated hometown. "Sleigh Bell Rock" was the b-side to that tipsy tune, and while both songs are revered by the rockabilly faithful, Three Aces And A Joker remained unknown to the public-at-large (at least, until the internet allowed fanatics like this guy to publish lengthy articles about the group). "Sleigh Bell Rock" has been reissued twice on Rhino's long out-of-print LP Rockin' Christmas: The 50's and on Buffalo Bop's CD Rockabilly Xmas. [back to list] [learn more]
- Christmas
Everyday, The Miracles (Motown, 1963)
Smokey Robinson and his crew were the only Motown act to release two Christmas albums during the label's "Golden Decade" (1962-1971). The first record, Christmas With The Miracles, was a more rockin' affair, recorded before Smokey developed the ultra-smooth style that gave us "Ooh Baby Baby" and "Cruising." The album contained but one original song, "Christmas Everyday." Beginning with the kind of drum crack that prompted John Lennon to query whether Motown's drummer "beat on a bloody tree," the Miracles spin a soulful metaphor similar to William Bell's "Every Day Will Be Like A Holiday." If the singer's girl would just acquiesce, each day could be as special as Christmas day. In his inimitable style, Smokey insists, "I wouldn't need a Christmas tree if you belonged to me." Not receiving satisfaction, he takes serious measures: "I wrote and told Santa Claus I needed you because it would be Christmas everyday." The best of both Miracles Christmas records is compiled on Our Very Best Christmas, which I strongly recommend.
"Christmas Everyday" was written by Smokey Robinson himself, and Grammer nerds will point out that his title is incorrect. Technically, it is Christmas "every day" (two words, meaning Christmas happens every single day), not Christmas "everyday" (one word, meaning Christmas is a commonplace occurence). But, really, do you want to be the guy who edits Smokey Robinson, the Poet Laureate of Young America? [back to list] [learn more]
- Christmas
Will Be Just Another Lonely Day, Brenda
Lee (Decca,
1964)
Pugnacious Brenda Lee wasn't even a teenager when she commenced her career as a rockabilly spitfire, and her style matured quickly as she became a seasoned pro by the ripe age of 14. That's when Lee recorded "Rockin' Around The Christmas Tree" (another Top 100 song), but she didn't cut a full Christmas album till she was nearly twenty. That record, Merry Christmas From Brenda Lee (1964), consists largely of "adult pop" like her version of Brook Benton's "That Special Time Of Year" - good stuff, but relatively sedate.
Two songs stick out like Christmas plums: the already classic "Rockin' Around The Christmas Tree" and the newly recorded "Christmas Will Be Just Another Lonely Day," a picture-perfect piece of Brill Building froth in the girl group tradition. As in most great girl group songs, Brenda's entire world depends on the all-powerful boy; the trappings of Christmas offer her no solace so long as he's away. Over pounding drums and swirling strings, Lee paints a vivid portrait of an isolated teenager, her self-esteem shriveling to nothing over lost puppy love. Politically correct? Nope. Powerful? Undeniably. Look for it on Brenda's Rockin' Around The Christmas Tree: The Decca Christmas Recordings and MCA's Rockin' Little Christmas. [back to list] [learn more]
- Santa Claus
Go Straight To The Ghetto, James
Brown (King, 1968)
Thanks to some high-profile reissues, James Brown's Christmas music has become widely accepted. When I first began collecting, it was rare stuff, and copies of Brown's original King Christmas LP's went for big bucks. Now, as much as I love his Yuletide jams, I'd have to say that they don't quite measure up to his best work - an admittedly high standard. What really sets them apart is their good humor and eccentricity. "Santa Claus Go Straight To The Ghetto" is, if anything, one of the most normal Christmas songs he recorded, and that makes it a natural choice for my Top 100. Over a cool, lazy funk, Brown gently pleads with ol' St. Nick to serve the needs of impoverished ghetto residents - though, interestingly, Brown emphasizes that he used to be one of them. "Jingle Bells" it ain't, but it's a fun example of the way the Godfather liked to insert positive messages into unlikely places. (Listen closely towards the end - Brown drops Hank Ballard's name for no apparent reason).
"Santa Claus Go Straight To The Ghetto" is from James Brown's second holiday album for King Records, A Soulful Christmas, released in 1968. Also issued as a single, it reached the Top 10 on Billboard's Christmas chart both that year and the next. It appears on most collections of Brown's holiday music, including the perennial favorite, Funky Christmas (1995), as well as The Complete James Brown Christmas (2010), a phenomenal package containing just about every seasonal track the Godfather of Soul ever committed to wax during his prime. [back to list] [learn more]
- Have Yourself
A Merry Little Christmas, Lou Rawls (Capitol, 1967)
Smooth as Courvoisier and cool as ice, Lou Rawls is like a Christmas cocktail - sure to have you head spinning by the end of the party, and all the merrier for it. Rawls' 1967 album Merry Christmas Ho! Ho! Ho! is fine throughout, but it's his swinging version of the modern classic "Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas" that has always resonated with me. Judy Garland first recorded the song back in 1944, and the song's hopeful outlook (during wartime, remember) struck an immediate chord with the public. Cats as formidable as Frank Sinatra and Tony Bennett have taken a shot at it, but, for me, it's Lou Rawls who forever defined the song. The riffing horns, the walking bass, and the emphatic drums combine in marvelous concert to support Lou's confident vocal, exuding just the right combination of swagger and familiarity. Rawls just flat nails it, and if a better version of this song exists, I haven't heard it. "Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas" also appears on Merry Christmas Baby (2006), a fine collection that samples from all three of his holiday albums. [back to list] [learn more] - Cool Yule, Rebel Pebbles (IRS, 1990)
Barely a footnote in the grand scheme of things, the Rebel Pebbles earned a place in my heart with their contribution to IRS Records' Just In Time For Christmas (read about it). A veritable cream puff of a song, "Cool Yule" marries girl group goofiness to garage rock swagger, coming up with a sound I've rarely heard before or since. Their closest living relative, actually, might well be Josie & The Pussycats, but comparisons to the Go-Go's are reasonable, too. Anyway, the Pebbles were an all-girl band featuring vocalist Rachel Murray and once-and-future Pandoras guitarist Karen Blankfield. At least on this slim evidence, the Rebel Pebbles were wholesomely unashamed of all things girly. Everything from diamonds and pearls to Bobby Darin (!) winds up on their hefty Christmas list, but they always return to their magnanimous wish for us all - have a cool Yule!
Postscript. On the strength of this song alone, I hunted down the Pebbles' sole 1991 long-player, Girls Talk. Featuring the minor hit, "Dream Lover," the album is pleasant enough, and it spawned a minor hit, "Dream Lover." But, its polished professionalism robs it of the sexy, off-the-cuff charm that makes "Cool Yule" so irresistible. On closer inspection, the Rebel Pebbles' recordings resembled the solo Belinda Carlisle more than the early Go-Go's. Too bad.
Feedback. Later, the Rebel Pebbles' lead singer, Rachel
Murray, sent me an email saying, "I just stumbled
onto your site and saw 'Cool Yule' listed
in your Top 100 Christmas
songs. As the songwriter (with Robin Fox and Michael
Gurley), I had to tell you that I couldn't have agreed
with you more on your assessment of our Christmas
single as opposed to our full-length LP. I have always
maintained that "Cool Yule" was our best
song, or at least our best recording. You were very
accurate in saying that the over-production of our
record made it way less charming than our Christmas
song. It was recorded before the full-length record
on a much smaller budget with Michael Gurley (my good
friend and leader of the band Dada) producing. Thanks
so much for mentioning it! Although I hear it occasionally
over the holidays, it's great to know that someone
else appreciates it as much as I do."Another Postscript. The Rebel Pebbles' first recording was a self-released, three-song cassette EP, Party Time (1990). One assumes it got them their record deal with IRS, but in-and-of-itself, it proved insanely rare. In 2011, however, it was reissued digitally by Capitol Records, which had long ago subsumed IRS. Party Time turned out to be much better than Girls Talk - loud, raw, jangly, and full of much the same girly power that super-charged "Cool Yule." Strongly recommended! [back to list] [learn more]
- Frosty
The Snowman, Ronettes (Philles, 1963)
The Ronettes' transformation of "Frosty The Snowman" begins with an irresistible backbeat lifted from one of their greatest hits, "Be My Baby," released just a few months earlier in 1963. And, it's slathered in sleigh bells, something ubiquitous in Phil Spector productions - even those unrelated to the holidays. In fact, "Frosty The Snowman" is a textbook example of his famed "Wall Of Sound," but I must insist that it's lead singer Ronnie Spector who's the star here, not her future ex-husband. She carries on confidently amidst Phil's musical maelstrom, recounting the tired old tale of Frosty as if she'd never heard it before - and as if there weren't a battalion of musicians vying for the spotlight. By the time she gets to her trademark "whoa oh oh" in the coda, we believe that a snowman really could come to life one day.
"Frosty The Snowman" is included on Phil Spector's essential 1963 album, A Christmas Gift For You, along with two more Top 100 Songs and nine more near-classics. Ronnie and Phil weren't yet married at the time - though they would carry on a long, tempestuous relationship marred by Phil's paranoia and abuse. Ronnie survived - see her memoir, Be My Baby - and she'd eventually record her own holiday record, Best Christmas Ever (2010). [back to list] [learn more]
- (Rockin')
Winter Wonderland, Fabulous Thunderbirds (Austin,
1983)
In 1983, the Fabulous Thunderbirds were between gigs. They'd come on like gangbusters for their first label, Chrysalis, waxing four hot platters of roots rock in just four years. Earning little more than critical acclaim, however, they were cut from Chrysalis in 1982 and didn't release another album till 1986, when Epic's Tuff Enuff made them big-time rock stars. During their major label hiatus, they recorded two tracks for An Austin Rhythm 'n' Blues Christmas, a collection of local artists on tiny Austin Records, a locally distributed Texas imprint. One of the T-Birds' efforts was an hellacious instrumental rendition of "Winter Wonderland" - an old Christmas standard that never actually mentions Christmas. Thanks to the band's later success, An Austin Rhythm 'n' Blues Christmas was reissued nationally by Epic, and the track was saved from obscurity. Powered by Kim Wilson's driving harp and Jimmie Vaughan's immaculate guitar - and anchored by spontaneous shouts of "Merry Christmas!" and "Feliz Navidad!" - "(Rockin') Winter Wonderland" sounds merrier and rocks harder than I had previously thought possible. [back to list] [learn more] - Little Drummer
Boy, Joan Jett & The Blackhearts (Boardwalk, 1981)
Sexy, diminutive Joan Jett has long been a hero to lonely rocker nerds such as this writer. When bare bones, honest rock 'n' roll was all but lost - buried under layers of hair spray and cheesy synthesizers - Jett and her Blackhearts always kept rock true to the founding principles of the form - loud, fast, and out-of-control. That said, their cover of Harry Simeone's classic Christmas fable, "Little Drummer Boy," starts out relatively faithful to the original, simply adding electric guitars, raising the volume, and upping the attitude. Restrained and parsimonious till the final minute, the Blackhearts ultimately cut loose in a blaze of guitar pyrotechnics before stuttering to a crashing halt - spent, but full of cheer.
"Little Drummer Boy" was recorded in 1981 during sessions for Jett's second solo album, I Love Rock 'n' Roll, her first supported by the newly founded Blackhearts. The song was not issued as a commercial single, but it was included on initial pressings of the album, released by Boardwalk Records during the holiday season. On subsequent pressings, it was replaced with "Oh Woe Is Me," recorded in February 1982. When Joan's own Blackheart Records reissued I Love Rock 'n' Roll on compact disc in 1992, "Little Drummer Boy" was restored to the album. Of course, it's also included on her excellent 2008 compilation, A Blackheart Christmas. In 2018, Jett recorded a new version of the song as an exclusive for Spotify, but it was subsequently released across the web. [back to list]
- Presents
For Christmas, Solomon Burke (Atlantic, 1966)
In 1955, the formidable Solomon Burke recorded a single for Apollo Records called "Christmas Presents." This very, very early in his career - possibly even his debut - long before he'd wax soul classics like "Cry To Me" and "Got To Get You Off My Mind" for Atlantic Records. Amazingly, however, "Christmas Presents" bears the unmistakable sound of soul music - four years before what many critics consider the first official soul song, the Drifters' "There Goes My Baby."
Over a decade later, Burke revisited the theme (and inverted the title) with an entirely new composition, his magnanimous, eccentric "Presents For Christmas." Alternately testifying and exhorting, the Reverend Burke shouts out to "every man, woman, boy, and girl in the world," with special wishes for all the disc jockeys, policemen, and pretty girls (in that order). Solomon brags he's "fat enough to be the world's biggest Santa Claus," poignantly confiding his wish to give presents to everyone in the world "under one great big Christmas tree."
"Presents For Christmas" was recorded in 1966, but it wasn't released until 1967 when it appeared on an Atlantic Records 7-inch single - which did not chart, by the way. In 1968, it appeared both on Burke's King Solomon Atlantic LP and on Atco Records' monumental compilation, Soul Christmas. Since then, it's been compiled on Rhino's Cool Yule series, Atlantic's updated Soul Christmas, and Burke's comprehensive boxed set, King Of Rock 'n' Soul: The Atlantic Recordings (1962-1968). [back to list] [learn more]
- Santa's
Got A GTO, Ramonas (self-released, 1990)
An all-girl rocker about Santa and a boss ride - what could be cooler? In a vengeful frenzy, San Francisco punks the Ramonas warn that Santa Claus is coming to town in a souped-up Pontiac to defend their honor against a boy who broke their hearts: "You better not cry, you better not frown, Santa's gonna run you down!" Despite their assertion that, "All I want for Christmas is to see you die," the group sounds positively gleeful as they chant "Ho ho ho! Ho ho ho! Santa's got a GTO!" dozens of times in a scant two minutes.
Formed in 1987, the Ramonas started as good friends who loved the Ramones, and they literally drew straws to see who would play what instrument since none of them were musicians! The Ramonas claimed to be "the first all-female Ramones tribute band in the world," and they recorded "Santa's Got A GTO" for a fan club cassette tape in a limited edition of 100. Its reputation grew as it got picked up by dee jays like Dr. Demento looking for cool stuff to play at Christmas. It finally earned a slice of immortality when it served as the title track for Santa's Got A GTO: Rodney On The ROQ's Fav X-mas Songs, a 1997 CD compiled by influential L.A. disc jockey Rodney Bingenheimer - and then served double duty for the second volume in 2017. Part of Bingeheimer's schtick was that he cruised around Hollywood in a blue 1967 Pontiac GTO, and that probably didn't hurt.... [back to list] [learn more]
- Hey
Santa Claus, Moonglows (Chance, 1953)
The hopped-up "Hey Santa Claus" provides ample evidence that the Moonglows - a group best-known for doo wop ballads like "Ten Commandments Of Love" and "Sincerely" - could rock with the best of them. With spirited support from the group (led by Harvey Fuqua and which, in later years, included Marvin Gaye), singer Bobby Lester implores old Father Christmas to bring his baby back. In the meantime, however, Lester and the boys seem happy just to be ballin' with the cats. When the sax solo - one of the finest honks ever recorded - launches suddenly after the second verse, this high-flying record goes into orbit.
"Hey Santa Claus" was released on 45 in 1953 by Chicago-based Chance Records as the flipside of the Moonglows' great ballad, "Just A Lonely Christmas," and both songs are included on MCA's slim-but-essential Rockin' Little Christmas (1986). "Hey Santa Claus" appears with some frequency on rock and rhythm 'n' blues holiday compilations, chief among them Rhino's Rockin' Christmas: The 50's (1984), Papa Ain't No Santa Claus, Mama Ain't No Christmas Tree (2003), Richard Weize Archive's Boogie Woogie Santa Claus: An R&B Christmas (2017), and Bear Family's Get Ready For A Groovy And Bluesy Christmas (2024). [back to list] [learn more]
- 2000
Miles, Pretenders (Sire, 1983)
When the Pretenders started out, they were so full of piss and vinegar (cf. "Precious," "Bad Boys Get Spanked") that I never would have guessed that they'd record a Christmas standard. But, they did - and how! "2000 Miles" is darn near pious, but it sounds like a great Pretenders record while also being obliquely religious, vaguely romantic, and absolutely festive. When first released for Christmas 1983, "2000 Miles" was easily the least acerbic song in Chrissie Hynde's portfolio to date. Impressionistic and nearly ambient, "2000 Miles" paints a perfect post-modern Christmas carol, one where the eternal hope of the season still means something in a world without saviors. Chiming and dreamy where the band was usually strident and aggressive, "2000 Miles" is a singular achievement, both within the Pretenders' catalogue and in the broader realm of Christmas rock.
Today, "2000 Miles" ranks up there with the Kinks' "Father Christmas" and Wham's "Last Christmas" as one of the most-covered holiday songs of the modern era. At the time, however, "2000 Miles" was seen as a protest against Britain's war in the Falkland Islands - despite the fact that the Falklands are over 8000 miles away from the UK.
In America, "2000 Miles" was first released as the b-side of "Middle Of The Road," the Top 20 lead single from the Pretenders' last great album, Learning To Crawl. In the UK, "2000 Miles" was released as an a-side with a picture sleeve and a non-LP b-side, "Fast Or Slow (The Law's The Law)," peaking at #15. The song was subsequently included on the Pretenders' retrospectives The Singles (1987), Greatest Hits (2000), Pirate Radio 1979-2005 (2006), and The Best Of Pretenders (2009). The song has also been compiled on The Edge Of Christmas (1995), New Wave Xmas (1996), VH1: The Big 80's Christmas (2001), and Elton John's Christmas Party (2005), among many others. [back to list]
- 'Twas The
Night Before Christmas, Snoop Dogg with Nate Dogg
(KROQ, 1997)
In 1996, Death Row Records (Suge Knight's infamous hip hop label) released Christmas On Death Row, an album of disappointingly tame rhythm & blues (read about it). The label's biggest star, rapper Snoop Dogg (together with sidekick Nate Dogg), headlined one of the album's high points, "Santa Claus Goes Straight To The Ghetto," a sequel of sorts to James Brown's more imperative original (another Top 100 song). It's a great track, but the Dogg boys would reach the pinnacle of their holiday hijinks the following year with a ghetto-fabulous rewrite of Clement Moore's 1923 poem, "A Visit from St. Nicholas," commonly known as "'Twas The Night Before Christmas."
The adjectives "filthy," "illicit," and "uproarious" hardly do justice to this funky tale wherein a visit from St. Nicholas nets Snoop some "chronic" (i.e. marijuana) to go with his gin and tonic. A "fat, red pimp" from the "north side" comes to visit, packing a sackful powerful smoke. Santa, it seems, has been indulging in some weed himself and, before he leaves, he has cleaned out Snoop Dogg's ample stash of munchies. "Merry Christmas to all you motherfuckers," Santa exclaims, "and to all a good high." Though certainly not for the faint of heart, "'Twas The Night Before Christmas" is an unparalleled hoot. In Nate Dogg's own words, it "made a nigga laugh." The song was specially recorded for A Family Christmas... In Your Ass, one of many installments in a series of albums compiled by Kevin & Bean, the legendary morning team for Los Angeles rock station KROQ. [back to list]
- Trim Your
Tree, Jimmy Butler (Gem, 1954)
Over the years, many, many songs have drawn a connection between sex and Christmas. None, however, makes that connection more explicit than Jimmy Butler's extended double entendre, "Trim Your Tree." A spirited jump blues, the song distinguishes itself mainly on lyrical content and Butler's lascivious, leering vocal. To say nothing of the many uses of the word "trim," Butler reveals hidden, dirty meanings in virtually every common Christmas image, climaxing with his pledge to "sprinkle my snow" upon his unsuspecting paramour's evergreen. With more recent songs like Snoop Dogg's "'Twas The Night Before Christmas" ("The children were snuggled up, sleeping in bed, my bitch on my jock giving holiday head"), the level of discourse became much more explicit, making "Trim Your Tree" (and similar songs from the mid-50's like the Midnighters' "Work With Me Annie" or the Dominos' "Sixty Minute Man") sound almost quaint by modern standards. I would argue, though, that by standards of the time, "Trim Your Tree" was dirtier by far, and it probably raised much more than eyebrows back in the day.
Jimmy Butler was a blues singer about whom we know nothing, and "Trim Your Tree" was released by Gem Records, a New York indie label. Butler was backed by the Blues Express Orchestra, which featured saxophonist Freddie Mitchell and seems to have been the Gem house band. Gem doesn't appear to have been a subsidiary of Savoy Records, a much larger New York indie, but their small catalog ended up in Savoy's holdings, and "Trim Your Tree" is a centerpiece of Savoy's Christmas Blues, which has been issued in a variety of formats over the years (read about it). The saucy song shows up frequently on Christmas blues compilations, including Document's Blues, Blues Christmas (2005), Richard Weize Archive's Boogie Woogie Santa Claus: An R&B Christmas (2017), and Bear Family's Get Ready For A Groovy And Bluesy Christmas (2024). [back to list] [learn more]
